What Lead Me to Take Time Away from Painting.
Taking a break. I didn’t think that I would even be able to take time away from my painting. But, that’s exactly what I did.
“Early in 2023, I felt things were really on track. I was busy getting ready for the Kalamazoo Art On The Mall Event in June. So, why did I not participate as a vendor?”
Well, let me explain.
Where I left things last year, I applied to be a vendor (I could feel this was something important God wanted me to do). I was excited, apprehensive, and some days, just plain fearful. Now that doesn’t happen to me very often. I’ve lived through so much that not much scares me. But, I was going outside my comfort zone and I am human.
I didn’t have a white canopy (which was an event requirement), nor did I have display racks, tables, and much more. What was I thinking? Well, I knew this is what God wanted me to do, and I would do anything for Him.
How would people see the work He’s commissioned me to do if I didn’t put myself out there? Plus, I knew He wanted me to apply. So I did as He instructed me to do. There are times God asks us to do things that we do not immediately comprehend.Then, we walk by faith.
I wasn’t aware of it at the time, but just when all the applicants were expecting a letter in the mail to confirm whether or not they would receive an invitation to be a vendor, something that hasn’t happened before, happened.
The letters didn’t go out on time so they did not arrive in mailboxes when they should have. Applicants were informed that because of the new event center being built and the new justice building construction in downtown Kalamazoo, the Art On The Mall Event ended up with fewer vendor booth spaces than normal!
Well, that just added to the drama and stress I was already experiencing. You may not be aware, but I was in a gallery in Arizona when I made almost all of my sales in the past.
I never had to load up my vehicle, set up displays, plan my inventory, spend money on marketing, or worry about the weather, etcetera. Now, I didn’t even know if I would be invited. Would there be room for me, would I be invited to be a vendor? Did I create enough inventory? Would we be able to set up the borrowed canopy quickly without any hassle? Did I forget anything? Time was running out.
It turned out that about two weeks from the start of the event, I received a letter that I was indeed invited! The reason the letter was so late was because the event planners had to check in with and confirm spots from the previous year vendors. They were the first to be invited back.
Once those spots were filled, then they moved on to the waitlist, which is what I was put on. Now I had to make a huge decision. Keep frantically working on my inventory and displays or choose to not attend the event in June. My joy of painting and creating new work was beginning to feel like a j-o-b with lots of pressure.
As time passed between the months of February when I first applied to mid-April when I was sent the invitation to attend, my emotions were definitely like being on a roller coaster ride. Ultimately, I felt too overwhelmed by all of the various factors that would make my first year as a vendor, just too daunting.
Let me also reiterate that I had been praying all along and I truly felt God didn’t want me to be a vendor at this point. That caused me to started thinking and asking God, “Well, why did you have me apply and go through the process if you didn’t want me to be a vendor?” God always knows the big picture and has His reasons.
Eventually, I realized that God just wanted the human part of me to feel validated. He wanted me to realize that I was good enough to be invited! I then accepted that God was helping me to feel confident enough that anything He commissioned me to create, I would know that I was good enough to complete it with His seal of approval.
He knows me, he created me. He needed to build my confidence. (My Mission is to be His tool and create art to draw His people closer to Him). But, simultaneously, He also let me know that it was very important that I attend the event as an attendee, not a vendor. God does work in mysterious ways! I still didn’t fully understand what He was doing.
I thanked my two very special ladies that were willing to help me set up and help with sales at the event. I let them know how things had progressed. Their willingness to give up two days of their own busy lives to help me meant so much!
My friend, Cyndi, offered to drive us to the event so I could do research and figure out why God wanted me to attend. Cyndi is also an art collector and was a collector of mine as well. She would be a good person to take along and get her thoughts on the events.
We did a lot of walking and it was going to be hot in the afternoon. It was Friday, June 2nd. We had water with us to stay hydrated. We began making our way to the Kalamazoo Art On The Mall Event first. This is where I would have been set up. There are actually two art events happening at the same time.
What follows are my true observations and personal thoughts. Let me tell you, I really admire the hard work and dedication that artists have to have in order to attend and participate in events like these!
At The Gate: Kalamazoo Art on the Mall Vendor Row.
Made in the shade on a hot June morning.
You Could Feel The Anticipation by Vendors and Attendees.
This was a very well organized event. I also thought it was a lovely setting. There were several places to eat, sit, and relax, as well as convenient bathroom facilities.
But, what became blatantly obvious was the long list of rules I received when I applied to be a vendor and the warnings about not having any items outside of your 10 x 10 tent was completely not being followed! I was stunned!
Vendors relaxing out behind their tents with their coolers.
I guess the “rules” were very relaxed despite what the written event documents stated.
One of the things I had been stressing about was how to lay out the interior of my borrowed tent so everything fit yet didn’t create any tripping hazards for customers. I was stressing about following every single rule when no one seemed to care — at least about this rule. Most vendors had items for sale out in front of their tent or canopy. Not only that, they physically sat out behind their tents! I would have had plenty of room and no need for being anxious.
The rules said that someone would come by one hour before the event and if you were found in violation of any of the rules, you would have to comply immediately or not be allowed to sell. Really? Well, maybe so and vendors then brought their chairs and coolers behind their tents after inspection? I do not know.
Most vendors had their tents set up in attractive ways with good traffic flow. But, the majority of the vendors were like I had read about; they sat to the side or in the back of their tent not paying any attention to passersby. They didn’t look up from their mobile phones. Even if they had some interesting items to sell, I found that if the vendor didn’t feel welcoming, it made me feel like I was intruding on their private space and I didn’t go in.
As I watched other attendees, they seemed to have felt the same way. If the vendors were on their phones or were busy setting up stock and didn’t look up, you felt like you were bothering them.
But there were some vendors that made the effort to welcome customers with a smile, were engaging, friendly, and had a lot more visitors — and I’m sure… more sales.
At this event, I met three stand-out artists. Each one knew their brand, were friendly and a joy to speak with about their art, what their artist journey was like, and what they thought about the event. They also made their sales an easy hassle-free experience. They had payment stations, bags for customers to put their art in, and were relaxed and grateful. These were pros.
From this event, Cyndi and I walked to the Kalamazoo Institute of Arts Art Fair in Bronson Park.At this point, the Doo Dah Parade was going on as well. I’ve never seen the parade, but I took some time to enjoy it.
Kalamazoo and Surrounding Areas Seemed to Really Turn Out for the Doo Dah Parade.
It’s hard to tell by this photo, but the streets were filled with parade watchers for many blocks in Downtown Kalamazoo.
Now, I had built this event (the KIA Art Fair) up in my mind. This was the most intimidating event to me because I am a self-trained artist. I don’t have an art degree.
As you get to know me better, you will notice that I look at myself as a spiritual being having a human experience. Because of this, I have been trying to train myself to mostly focus daily on the spiritual part of my existence. I need to be close to God. At times, however, I slip back into my human frailties and seem to manufacture doubts.
Entering Bronson Park:
The KIA Art Fair
This Art Fair would hold the most talented artists in the region. It’s a big deal for artists.
By the time of this event, I had convinced myself that since I don’t have technical “art training,” the Kalamazoo Institute of Arts’ students would be leagues above me and maybe I didn’t deserve to be at events like this. Yet, my faith in God was unwaivering. I knew He doesn’t make mistakes.
I walked through the KIA Art Fair and really enjoyed the creativity and the art that was for sale. I got a good feel for the event and what was really good art and what was just okay (remember, these are my opinions). One water-color artist was very exceptional. His art was amazing!
After about a half hour, I told Cyndi that I had seen enough and I was ready to leave. Her face showed genuine surprise. She thought I would want to see every single vendor before leaving. I told her that I was ready, I had seen enough.
“We were at the event for about 2 hours at this point. But, I had figured out why God felt it was so important for me to attend.”
As we walked back to the parking ramp, everything began to be very clear in my mind. God had me apply to be a vendor at Kalamazoo Art On The Mall for the experience of it, to see for myself as an artist what was required, to see if I would follow His instructions, and to see the ups and downs of that lifestyle (being an artist that travels to events to setup, breakdown, and stand on your feet for hours selling, and dealing with the general public that is sometimes very rude and unappreciative).
This 2-Day Event Typically Sees Over 30,000 Attendees.
I enjoyed the morning at both events. By the time I left, I knew that this type of setting was not where God wanted me to be.
I don’t consider myself “old,” and I don’t have any health issues, but as I pondered all of this experience in my mind, I definitely knew this lifestyle wasn’t for me. Maybe if I had my husband, Rich, and we were thirty years younger? But he’s no longer here, I’m tired from being his caregiver for over twenty-one years, and I do not have the energy reserves for that lifestyle… especially all by myself. Maybe I am old! But, I am a realist. I can’t be that kind of artist.
On the ride back home, I came to the realization that even though God did not want me to be a vendor at the downtown events, He did encourage me to stay local. I had images of the Vicksburg Farmer’s Market come to mind. Is that where He wanted me to focus? I wasn’t quite sure.
The summer was just beginning.
As I think about it, the title of this post may be a bit misleading. I did work on several wonderful commissioned projects through the year. I just meant I was not creating art to sell. I think I’ll leave the title as it is!
I can’t wait until I share what God did with me next. I never saw this coming! But, at the time, the one thing I knew was that as a human being, I was feeling relieved. There were too many ups and downs to reveal here, but the roller coaster ride was over. I decided to take a well-deserved break. The summer was mine.
Until next time, be well, be blessed.
